Nobody in this world feels whole and complete. We all sense some gap in our character something we need or want but cannot get on our own. When we fall in love, it is often with someone who seems to fill that gap. The process is usually unconscious and depends on luck: we wait for the right person to cross our path, and when we fall for them we hope they return our love. But the seducer does not leave such things to chance.
Look at the people around you. Forget their social, exterior, their obvious character traits: look behind all of that, focusing on the gaps, the missing pieces in their psyche. That is the raw material of any seduction. Pay close attention to their clothes; their gestures, their offhand comments, the things in their house certain looks in their eyes get them to talk about their past, particularly past romances. And slowly the outline of those missing pieces will come into view. Understand: people are constantly giving out signals as to what they lack. They long for completeness, whether the illusion of it or the reality, and if it has to come from another person, that person has tremendous power over them. We may call them victims of a seduction, but they are almost always willing victims.
This chapter outlines the eighteen types of victims, each one of which has a dominant lack. Although your target may well reveal the qualities of more than one type there is usually a common need that ties them together. Perhaps you see someone as both a New Prude and a Crushed Star, but what is common to both is a feeling of repression and therefore a desire to be naughty, along with a fear of not being able or daring enough. In identifying your victims type, be careful to not be taken in by outward appearances. Both deliberately and unconsciously, we often develop, a social exterior designed specifically to disguise our weaknesses and lacks. For instance, you may think you are dealing with someone who is tough and cynical, without realizing that deep inside they have a soft sentimental core. They secretly pine for romance. And unless you identify their type and the emotions beneath their toughness you lose the chance to truly seduce them. Most important expunge the nasty habit of thinking that other people have the same lacks you do. You may crave comfort and security but in giving comfort and security to someone else, on the assumption they must want them as well, you are more likely smothering and pushing them away.
Never try to seduce someone who is of your own type. You will be like two puzzles missing the same parts.